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by Merrill Saint-Simon Regarding the monster lawsuit brought by Ms. Smith against the biggest hedge fund on the street, we just found out the parties in the adjudication have agreed to a one month stay of litigation while they engage in out-of-court settlement talks. The word on the street is that the CEO may be willing to commit his outfit to a new policy of diversity, equity and inclusion, and that Ms. Smith might go along with that commitment—as long as she also gets a significant amount of money. We also heard that the Journal’s chief investigative reporter has the story of what really happened behind the scenes to bring about this unexpected settlement offer. He says it's because Ms. Smith is now claiming she has a witness to back up her story. But the Journal’s legal department is said to be wary of publishing that investigative report. Very wary. They say the last time the Journal published a story about that particular CEO, they spent the next two years fighting a slander lawsuit. Our spy at the Journal's senior staff meeting this morning said the legal department said that because the incident happened behind closed doors, no one could prove what either of them are saying. The investigative reporter quickly spoke up, complaining, "What about her witness?" The Journal’s boss closed the meeting by saying they would hold off on publishing the investigative report until they found out who the so-called witness was and what he, or she, had to say. The boss told all the reporters to get out there and beat the bushes. He said, "We have to find that witness."Meanwhile, clear across town in the non-financial world: “Hey, look at this article in today's Money Talk News. Could you be the witness they’re talking about?” “Not me. No way. I hope they don’t even find out about me.” “Was it a setup? Did you do it?” “Where'd you hear that? Even if my name did come up, I don’t think they’ll ever figure out how the whole thing worked. Anyhow, I’ll be all right as long as she keeps my name out of it.” “But they’re offering her a lot of money. What if revealing her witness is a condition for her to get the big payoff." “Well, I guess if that happened, I’ll have no other option but to make a run for it.” “Run? Where could you run that with all their money and contacts they wouldn’t be able to find you?” “Oh, it’s not as hard to disappear in this country as you might think. Do you think anybody knows the names of those people living under tarps and cardboard boxes on the streets of downtown LA?” “Is that where you’d go?” “No, of course not. Just kidding. But it is possible to disappear. When I was a college student up north, I used to hike in the redwoods. One day, I ventured deeper into the forest than ever before, and guess what I found.” “What?” “There was some guy living out there. In a tent with his dog. Said he’d been living out there for years.” “So, if you disappear, that’s where you’ll be?” “Naw. Forget I even mentioned such a thing.” We just heard that there has been an out-of-court settlement in that lawsuit brought by Ms. Smith against the biggest hedge fund on the street. Reportedly, she's going to produce her witness. We just heard the supposed settlement in the lawsuit brought by Ms. Smith against the biggest hedge fund on the street has been cancelled, and the hedge fund has now filed a counter suit against her. Apparently, the person Ms. Smith said was a witness to it all seems to have disappeared. Copyright 2022. All rights reserved. |